Being KED

You know, there is this voice in everybody's head which talks to you often.....does it?
I thought, I'll give it a name...KED?
So KED and me and best pals, we talk alot, which gives other people ideas that I'm Schizo...no it actually doesnt....coz nobody knows about KED.

You know how when you get your house painted and after a while the layer of paint starts to fall off? Well, you develop cracks at first....So there was I starting to kinda...peel them off...basically rub away the lose paint off....thats when I had this conversation....with KED!

KED: Hey, what the f*ck are you doing?
(arrogant...isn't he?)
Me: Nothing.....just...
KED: Why the hell are you wasting your time rubbing off paint from the wall? Don't you have better things to do in life?
Me: I do...but this is important....
KED: Well...NEWS FLASH dude...how does this help, kindly explain....or should I say elucidate...
Me: You see, umm...these exposed parts of the wall will remind me that I need to do something about it....and when I do...I'll know where to start!
KED: Interesting....

So What's in a name?

Zed called today, to give me the news that she is getting married...it's funny sometimes when people call you to tell you that they are getting married...

Zed: Hey!
Me: Hi...Wassup? long time no see!
Zed: yeah, I know! So, how've you been?
Me: Oh just been busy with work, there is so much to do nowadays!
Zed:Ok...Now I've called up to give you some exciting news!
Me: Yeah? What...are you getting married or something? (chuckles)
Zed: Yeah!I'm engaged!
Me: .......Wow!..That's great! congratulations!

Now...this part....she'll tell me the the name...what will I say..."umm...sounds nice! I think he'll keep you happy" or.."hmm...sounds like a clown....was he here with his circus group?" or "what....what kind of a name is that? Is he from this planet?"

Sounds of The Mumbai City

Just when you are lying down in bed for your sound sleep.......sound sleep (chuckle).....

Sounds of the city

Aaaa! Aaaaa!

Honk Honk!

Vrooooooooooom!

"Abe Hat Teri Baain*****"

Dishum Dishum!

Mammaaaaaaaa!

WAAaaaaaaaaaa!

When you think you've reached somewhere...its just Grant Road!

I know most of you don't even know what this post is all about, but if you live in Mumbai, India, you might just understand a bit or two.
I live in South Mumbai and travel for work to Matunga by the local train. It's a 20 min journey which has a lot of stops. I walk in to the train and take my seat, take out my iPod. I start listening to my music as its the best distraction from the 20 mins it'll take me to reach work....aah the time. Anyways, 3 songs are over, 12 minutes down the like...with my journey....and you'll think I reached somewhere....somewhere closer to work..as the train slows down to stop at a station, I look out of the window to see which station have I reached.....its just Grant Road, which is like the 3rd station! I still have lots more to go before I reach my destination......

Life is like....

Well we all know this phrase...'life is like an ice cream, eat it before it melts'....if you think about it, there can be any comparison....and when I say 'any comparison', I mean it!

Lets try this....

Life is like dried leaves.....enjoy their rustling sound before they fly away!
hmmmm.....

Life is like a bottle of after shave.....make use of it, before it vapourises!
That's infact closest to the original....lets try something else.....

Life is like an economical car....you gotta maintain it properly to get better mileage!
Interesting thought!

Life is like electricity....too much consumption can lead to load shedding (power cuts!)
Bah!, Humbug!

Life is like technology.....you always like the latest version...
Intrigued....

Life is like this blog post.....goes on and on and on.....
Cheers!

-kd

Where's Garfield?

interesting....normally this question is meant for Waldo.....
Waldo.....you don't know Waldo? Its that guy with round specs wearing red and white striped cap and t-shirt, who hides behind stuff in a massive crowd of....what ranges from Vikings to Pirates to a Circus full of people!

Anyways...its not about him....its about Garfield....we all know him, the fat orange cat who is in love with lasagna and loves to sleep all day! Well Jim Davis, who is the creator of Garfield, who also shares his birthday with me...heheh......gave a recent interview and mentioned that he loves Garfield Minus Garfield...if you haven't seen it...do check it out! It really goes deep into Jon Arbuckle's character on how he is such a schizophrenic boring individual and proves that his life without the 'fat cat' is boring!

Well check it out for yourself....

Funniest Typo Errors

We all have been typing our way into chat rooms and emails for a long time now...so that means, our hands should be very comfortable on the keyboard, like right now I'm looking at the screen and typing this post....Mwhuhahahha.....nevertheless, I dunno how many times I'm hitting the 'backspace' key!!

There are certain Typo errors which can just crack anyone up....
If you dunno what 'typo' errors are..well its those words where the spelling goes wrong due to the a small slip of one of the fingers while typing. It's funnier in chat messages because you dont read the message before sending it, emails.....you might be proof-reading it!

So the funniest Typo errors.....according to me

Remember that time when u wanted to laugh really hard at a friend's message on chat u wanted to type "HAHAHAHAHA" or "HEHEHEHE"
well....you just had a butter toast and ur fingers are all slippery....so you type.."JEJEJEJEJEJE" or "JAJAJAJAJAJAJA"


..

.....

........I'm waiting for you to finish laughing....

It looks funnier when its in lower case, ie. smaller letters...." jejejejejeje" or "jajajajajaja"

...
.....
........
Ah well....The letter 'g' is not working properly on my keyboard....so most of the time I'm "typin" "workin" "chillin" "watchin" "chattin" and even "emailin" !!! "good god" becomes "ood od"......"gosh" becomes "osh"
....
...
..
.....
I was once chatting with one of my friends, who is studying in New Jersey, and I was talking about my plans to study further....
I said I want to go to the Boston Universoty......he jokingly asked me whether its a bad copy of the original "Boston University" just like "SunSilk" shampoo becomes "SunMilk"


but by far the funniest typo error that I've come across......is....

I was chatting with one of my friends and I happen to show her a site which was "funny"......she types...

"Hey...that was funnt"

FUNNT :D

Njoy Typin

-kd

Somethings a miss

(click...if you can't read this properly)

Waiting for that one phone call, or waiting for one of the million phone calls that you deserve. Somethings always a miss, whether its a friend who's always by your side, or its the wire that connects the phone to the main socket. It could also be the fact that you've not given your number to anyone....maybe because you yourself don't know! Now....won't that be fun!!

You'd always wished if they cared just a little bit more, maybe they don't show it, may be they should.

Knock Knock

(click to see larger view)

Knock Knock
Who's There?
Granny, Knock Knock
Who's There?
Granny, Knock Knock
Who's There?
Granny, Knock Knock
Who's There?
Granny, Knock Knock
Who's There?
Knock Knock
Who's There?
Aren't you glad granny's gone?

A stupid joke I once heard, actually read...in a knock knock joke book. There is a point to which the dormant volcano stays dormant. The little constant irritating nerve racking incessant bark-like brain squashing tapeworm of a poke can do the trick. Often these dormant volcanoes have been bearing the brunt of other creatures pee-ing on them. They do get pissed off (pun intended), and do spit out molten lava particles in the forms of abuses (%$&# $%).

Piece and Quiet

(click to read the comic....in a larger size)

Piece & Quiet.....sounds of silence, the city of dreams!A woman screaming at her 6 year old son to get his butt back home for dinner, play time is over!
Piece & Quiet, when you read that bestseller, 12 months after it was released, and 3 months after it won some book award thingy. You had been waiting to get a piece of the baywindow in your home, that's the reason why you got that special place built, for reading, overlooking the lawn and lake nearby. The feeling of serenity, a divine-ness crawling under your skin, the point is...you won't read, you'll gaze outside the window forever, lost in the beauty. The books will be stacked in the same order that you had put in the first place near the 'reading point'.

Piece & Quiet while eating the most scrumptious and the most delicious Mud Cake, you dear friend got for you, as she knew you like it. You've always liked her, never had the heart to admit it, never took a step forward, just ate the cake enjoying every crumb of it, relishing it as it'll never come again. You walked her home in the moonlit evening, your chance, time for redemption, time to make a move....and you did, make a move...back home.

Piece & Quiet with your pets, barking, sqeaking, screaming etc.
You got them because you were lonely, you needed someone who could snuggle up to you. A Boa Constrictor does that too! That rocking chair with a car purring on your lap, as you smoke into the silence. You're 60!

A little bit, A little Piece of Peace and some Quiet!

Order Now!

(click to enlarge...the comic, you dumbass!)

You'll always believe that you don't need to read this....mind you, it's for your own benefit. There are certain things that you need, there are certain things that you want! Your goal is to at least have enough of what you need, and some of what you want. Ours is to sell you something that you don't even want, forget need!

May I offer you an aerodynamically designed padded cover for your car seatbelts when they put pressure on you shoulder or chest. For all those years you've driven without any seatbelts.....Let us make the rest comfortable.

May I offer you zero gravity boots that let you walk over your neighbour's ceiling, give you more options to sneak in his home while his wife's alone.

May I offer you ultra high quality biodegradable plastic bags made from Polyutherineglutamate, the strongest plastic ever! to carry all those heavy sharp metal boxes.

May I offer you night vision goggles so that you can start your own 'I Spy' agency.

May I offer you the latest touchscreen mobile phone, to make a call, find the nearest telephone booth!

May I offer you Packaged Drinking Water from the French Springs. Made in India!

May I offer you the finest full sleeves cotton+linen shirt from Old Navy, most famous brand in USA. Cloth bought from India, Manufactured in Sri Lanka.

May I offer you FartyPants, with pioneering technology to turn fart odour into flowery fragrance, just like the turn of a knob on your ambi pur car.

May I offer you a 'Thinkpad' Notebook at a price thats bound to make you fall into debts. Made in China.

Just Imagine.....I will be waiting at your doorstep....

Ctrl + C & Ctrl + V

They always said that you had your dad's nose and your mom's eyes! It's like CTRL+C and CTRL+V!
It is an important tool for our survival, for our so-called bread and butter with cheesy dip! That notepad you used to take notes from in the library...It's still lying there with your blue ball point pen, laying there on the yellow sheet of the notepad, under the dust.

We all are here to make a point, often it is the same point. We all put the right foot forward while climbing down the stairs, it gives us the sense of security. While handing a sharp object to a person, you always make sure the sharp end points towards you (at least I hope you do!). You always say you don't want other's sympathy, but at some level, you do! You always rehearse your dialogue in front of the mirror before you go out and hand her the flowers you picked yourself!

Simple keys on the keyboard...CTRL.... Learned, passed on, drilled in, evolved, adapted.